March 2004

Skinny-dipping: yes

Q: My boyfriend talks all the time about the freedoms of skinny-dipping, and generally being naked outside. I'd like to try it too, but the thought of getting caught kills my urge. Any ideas how I can make sure we don't get seen?
SB, Fort Wayne, IN

A: Who cares if you get caught skinny-dipping? Really, who does? I live for the whole nudist thing, and I absolutely love the freedom that comes with ditching clothes. We should all do it more often. For you, I recommend two things. First, start walking around your OWN house more often in the nude. Start getting the feeling of these joys of clotheslessness (I think I just made that word up). Next, by all means, hit a nude beach. Go and see how easily you fit in, and life will never be the same. Never. By the way, I like the way your boyfriend thinks!

Them thar tattoos

Q: Why do you dislike tattoos so much? I think they say a lot about a person.
TB, State College, PA

A: I agree, they do say a great deal about the person, unfortunately perhaps. I don't plan on having the same artwork on my walls until I die, why should my body be any different. Also, don't forget, what's cool with one generation will soon be considered bogus and ridiculed by the next. Talk about being marked for the future.

As for the connection to pain when getting a tattoo, give me a fucking break.

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